Do You Have Relationship Maturity?

Posted On: October 15, 2014

Please read this quote:

“To be mature you have to realize what you value most. It is extraordinary to discover that comparatively few people reach this level of maturity. They seem never to have paused to consider what has value for them. They spend great effort and sometimes make great sacrifices for values that, fundamentally, meet no real needs of their own. Perhaps they have imbibed the values of their particular profession or job, of their community or their neighbors, of their parents or family. Not to arrive at a clear understanding of one’s own values is a tragic waste. You have missed the whole point of what life is for.”

– Eleanor Roosevelt


Most people don’t reach maturity because they do not stop to think about what is valuable to them.

I was blown away by this quote, and it was only at second read that I realised it was by a woman I already have a lot of respect for: Eleanor Roosevelt.

This is so obvious, but profound.

If you can understand that what’s important to each of us is different, then why can’t you comprehend the importance to clarify for what it is that is different?

We take on what others want for us – out of love.

We do what others tell us to do.

We get busy. Or we are genuinely busy.

And then along the way, some of you might stop and ask yourselves: What am I doing?

It shouldn’t be an excuse, but this is something I hear all the time:

I didn’t think about it.

When were you planning to think about it?

What kind of life do you want?

If it is about being in a relationship, what is it you value most?

How are you going to make sure you are on the same page with your partner?

How are you both then going to make sure you get it?


Why do all this?

Because Eleanor Roosevelt already said it for you.

If you don’t, you miss the whole point of life.

Are you guilty of almost missing the whole point of life?

Do you look back at your life with regrets?

Reflection is necessary.

It’s not too late. It’s never too late. It’s not too late because you are not dead.

Would you like to explore what it is that is important and of value to you?

If yes, I can help you gain maturity within yourself, and also within your relationships.

I’d like to invite you to enquire about sexualty and/ or relationship coaching services here!


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Who is Martha?

Dr. Martha Tara Lee is Founder and Clinical Sexologist of Eros Coaching. She is a certified sexologist with a Doctorate in Human Sexuality. She provides sexuality and relationship coaching for individuals and couples, conducts sexual education workshops and speaks at public events. She is the author of the book Love, Sex and Everything In-Between, and the host of the weekly radio show Eros Evolution on OMTimes Radio. For more, visit or email




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