Being an avid book reader and lover, I have been asked often what my favourite books are, and I have always found myself stumped.
This post 10 Books That Will Change Your Life by Mind Valley triggered my thinking: “What are the books that changed my life”?
This has to be number one because I wrote it! It changed my life – at least from the status of blogger and writer, to author. Read how my book came about here.
This book contains essays on sex and sexuality, and is the only book of its kind in Singapore, Asia, and the world because it was written through my lenses as a person, woman, Singaporean, Chinese and sexologist.
Find out how you can get it here.
This book changed my view of God, spirituality and religion – from one where is only one true God to realising that God is infinite and everywhere.
It is not one, but a set of three books. There are also many other related books by the same author, Neale Donald Walsch.
I am subscribed to, and continue to follow the writings of the author through his enewsletter here.
I was really impressed from years ago how this simple tale touched me and influenced me in my own life.
The book is on what happens when we don’t deal with changes, and provides us with tools to deal with things that make us nervous and uncomfortable.
It uses storytelling well and way before it became popular in corporate culture in recent years. This is a timeless tale that models how teaching cane be done without the lecturing.
Written by Robin Sharma, I loved this book so much that I bought multiple copies for friends one Christmas – most of whom did not bother to thank you (but that’s another story).
This book is a courageous tale about questioning what you think is important is really important, and encourages you to find your own path without the lecturing.
Written by Louis L Hay whom I have dubbed the Mother of Affirmations, affirmations are a tool introduced in the book and explained in numerous ways. Affirmations are statements that you make in the 1) present tense; 2) positively-worded; 3) and you don’t have to believe in them.
Affirmations can be used 1) to bring to awareness what you want to change about your life; 2) to reprogram the negative programming of your thoughts; 3) to transform your life. It is no hocus-pocus because it worked many times through my life, and I encourage you to read this book for yourself. Watch this video I made explaining affirmations and releasing here.
A compulsory reading for me when I was training to be a sexologist, Mating in Captivity shifted my perceptives about sex, sexuality, love and relationships in more than one way.
Each chapter is chock-a-block full of new insights for me. It opened my eyes to a whole new world of understanding, and corrected many of my misconceptions and misunderstandings in which I was viewing the world, and the way in which I was navigating through life.
Another book which was compulsory reading as a budding sexologist from years ago was The Erotic Mind by Jack Morin.
This book addresses why what turns us on is not necessarily what really turns us on, as accordingly to society or the media. It really delves into the way we as individuals think. The Erotic Equation inside is useful as well, and continues to be something I talk about in my work.
All the works by David Deida are beautifully written. However this book is one of my favourites because it is written through the lenses of man about men and for men.
It helped me get into the heart and soul fo man like nothing else I have ever read. I have since first reading recommended it to many men who are trying to understand themselves, and women who are trying to understand them. Most report that the book really help them in ways nothing else ever did.
Over the years, this book was recommended to me by many sources. To my dismay, it was one of many books which I want to but is not available at our local national library.
When I finally ordered it on Amazon and started on it during my second personal retreat, it took me to places I never thought a book could. I cried at every chapter. I had to pause, stop, brace myself for each page.
A lot of things came up for me – being a woman, being a sensitive soul, being psychologically, emotionally and physically “wounded” by our own families, men, and society. Tears are not a bad thing. The book showed me the many layers of hurt, fears and pains I have taken on as a woman, and it brought about much healing in different ways. I am glad I own this book because this is one deeply spiritual book which I know I will have to revisit many times through my life, and it will read differently each time I do as I evolve.
10) The Artist’s Way
This book was also recommended to me. I did manage to borrow it from the library, and was amazed by the many exercises within.
Intended as a book in which you journal with, I bought a used copy off Amazon and proceeded to go through all the exercises. I did go through all of them at the start of 2014, and it did heal many of my baggage around not being creative or creative enough! I have certainly been giving myself a lot more permission to express!
Surrounded by friends who were sexually inhibited and struck by dire lack of positive conversations around sex and sexuality in Singapore, Dr. Martha Tara Lee decided to take it upon herself to right this societal injustice in 2007. She set out to make a positive difference in embarking on her doctorate in human sexuality, then launching Eros Coaching in 2009. Today, she remains dedicated to working with individuals and couples who wish to lead self-actualised and pleasure-filled lives.
She also holds certificates in counselling, coaching and sex therapy, and is currently pursuing her fourth degree – a Masters in Counselling. In practice for more than seven years, she is the only certified sexuality educator by the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT) in Singapore.
Often cited in the local media, Dr. Lee is the appointed sex expert for Men’s Health Singapore, and Men’s Health Malaysia. She was recognised as one of ‘Top 50 Inspiring Women Under 40′ by Her World in July 2010, and one of ‘Top 100 Inspiring Women’ by CozyCot in March 2011. She is the host of weekly radio show Eros Evolution on the OMTimes Radio Network. She has published two books: Love, Sex and Everything In-Between, and Orgasmic Yoga.
Martha works with individuals and couples in private coaching sessions, and conducts her own workshops. She takes prides in making sure all her workshops are also fun, educational, and sex-positive. This comes easily to her because even though she is extremely dedicated and serious about her work, she fundamentally believes that sex is meant to be fun, wonderful, amazing and sacred. As such, this serious light-heartedness has shone through again and again. For her full profile, click here. Email her here.