Opening Up to Opening Up: A Deep-Dive into Non-Monogamy (Visiting Australian Sex Educators!)

Posted On: May 17, 2020

Date/Time
Date(s) - 17/05/2020
10:00 am - 5:00 pm

Location
Basic Studio

Categories


A deep-dive into alternative relationship models, and for people that want to know more about where they sit on a spectrum of monogamous to not-at-all monogamous.

Are you thinking about opening up your relationship, but don’t know where to start?

Have you already started down the path towards some form of non-monogamy / polyamory, but have a sense that things could be rolling more smoothly?

Are you conceptually interested in poly, but in need of help with some of the pragmatics and / or handling jealousy?

We’re in changing times. Various expressions of polyamory are common dinner-table conversations these days, along with other alternative relationship models… But solid, carefully thought-out and pragmatic education can be hard to come by, especially in a world that mostly only values monogamy. And while polyamory can be easy and very positive, it rarely goes smoothly without some deliberate work and planning.

To help with this, we believe you’ll find our workshop, ‘Opening Up to Opening Up (a deep-dive into alternative relationship models)’ useful.

This non-monogamy / polyamory workshop is for people that want to know more about where they sit on a spectrum of monogamous to not-at-all-monogamous. It makes no assumptions that any type of relationship is right for all people, let alone you. But it also appreciates that many people don’t feel quite ‘at home’ in the standard, off-the-shelf model of what a relationship is meant to look like.

This workshop is not designed as a breezy walk in the park. It’s a nuanced in-depth, deep-dive into what’s required for an intentional, deliberate relationship. We expect you to come out of it with a good sense of what you’re up for, what you’re not up for, and how you might like to start exploring.

The content of this open-relating workshop is respectful, ethically-informed, and non-judgemental. We’re aiming to supply the tools and information you need, so that you can understand and comfortably explore what might be right for you.

Rog (from Curious Creatures) and Tess (from Curious Creatures and ConnectAble Therapies) are highly experienced facilitators of sexuality, relationships, and self-development workshops. They present in a calm, respectful environment and you’ll be surprised how normal these discussions can be and how much fun!

INTENSITY: At least two chillies (out of four).
WHO’S IT FOR: Anyone interested in deep-diving into the nuances, challenges, myths and realities around relationship dynamics and how to explore them.
WHO’S IT NOT FOR: People that are happily in monogamous relationships, or that are confident that that’s where they want to be. People who already have a lot of experience with non-monogamy might still find this a useful refresher, or new way of looking at things.​
WHAT EXERCISES / ACTIVITIES?: A variety of exercises designed to help you unfold the right relationship structures and context for you. This includes some inner-work exercises (where you work alone, on a worksheet), some pair-work (where you verbally discuss things with a randomly chosen partner), and some purely discussional small group-work.
WILL THERE BE PARTNER WORK?: Yes, all verbal exercises are without physical touch. Random pairing will occur for those who do not come as a pair and you’re welcome to be paired (or sit the exercise out) whenever you want.
HOW WILL PARTNERING BE DONE?: Randomly (if we can count!). Please note that although you’re welcome to arrive with intimate partners, this workshop doesn’t include ‘relationship work’, and pair-work exercises will be done with a stranger.
CAN YOU WORK WITH AN EXISTING PARTNER / FRIEND?: Yes, you can work with a friend/partner throughout the day or be paired with others whenever you like. There is only 1 verbal exercise in which we highly recommend working with a stranger.
NUDITY & SEXUAL CONTENT: There is none, however there is likely to be discussions and education around relationships and various expressions of sexuality (‘Nudity’ and ‘Sexual Content’ is only mentioned here because Curious Creatures run a variety of other sexuality workshops).
COMMITMENT: It’s a full day 10am-5pm, mostly theory with some activities (verbal and written)
RATIO EXPERIENTIAL / THEORETICAL: Approximately 70/30 Theory and experiential (exercises).
BRING: A bottle of water, snacks, lunch or $$ to buy lunch in the break half-way through the day.
WEAR: Comfy sitting clothes, we have beanbags, cushions and chairs.

Testimonials:

“This workshop was incredibly comprehensive in covering the forms of non-monogamy, and what can come up in exploring it. I appreciated how open-minded and non-judgey it was – I noticed that monogamy wasn’t judged as bad and that the workshop truly aimed to help people find the right relational style for them. I enjoyed the playful dynamic between the facilitators, and their sharings around their own open relationship (and personally different styles of non-monog). What stood out to me is that communication and relational skills can be learned that will help me and partners navigate more easefully. And that the ‘teething period’ between monogamy and polyamory can be the hardest, but once skillful polyamory is established: joy!”

“Thank you both for putting together training with so much care and thought and humour. I really appreciated how thorough you’ve been and the fact the such workshops exist at all.”

“I really appreciated your personal shares and anecdotes, they were the most engaging and informative parts of the day for me. I also really appreciated the breaking down of jealousy and the suggested personal work to move through it.”

CURIOUS CREATURES – ROGER BUTLER

Curious Creatures believes in a world where personal empowerment, sexual freedom, diversity of expression, and spectacularly good communication skills are the norm. It’s one thing to agree that, in theory, consent and communication and safety are important. Putting that into practice, however, is a little harder. In some ways, Curious Creatures exists as a response to that challenge.

Roger Butler is the driving force behind Curious Creatures, along with some very special co-facilitators.  Roger Butler was brought up white, middle-class, mostly heterosexual, and male. In addition to that lineage, they now identify as kinky, tantric, polyamorous, queer, and very, very curious. Their training is in Process Oriented Psychology and the facilitation of groups, coupled with an extensive education in sexuality.

Rog has been creating and facilitating Curious Creatures sexuality workshops for six years. Prior to this they facilitated well over a thousand workshops across various industries. They’re easily one of Australia’s most prolific sexuality workshop facilitators.

On their podcast Curious Conversations about Sex, Rog speaks on topics as broad as complex relationship dynamics, body image, gender issues, sex in long-term relationships, kinky sex, abuse and trauma, modern tantra, and sex work. If you’d like to book Rog as a speaker or interview them on your show, please contact us.

In 2000, Rog completed the one-year training offered by the Groupwork Institute of Australia, later accredited as the Advanced Diploma of Group Facilitation.  This is Australia’s most advanced training dedicated to the facilitation of groups.

From 2001 until now, Rog has extensively studied in Process Oriented Psychology, focusing on very robust models of conflict resolution and group facilitation, relationships and sexuality, power and rank issues, and general counselling skills.  These studies have included:  ANZPOP Two-Year Certificate in Process Oriented Psychology, 710 hours of in-person training, 300 hours of private practice, 86 hours of supervised practice, 300 hours of personal therapy.

Additionally, Rog has undertaken professional development and study relating to sex and sexuality, including training with the Institute of Somatic Sexology, Barbara Carrellas’s Urban Tantra Professional Training Program, Seani Love, and Dossie Easton.

Curious Creatures believes that sex is about delicious, hedonistic experience as well as being a path of self development and a contribution to a less violent world. They run workshops in a whole range of related topics in cities across Australia.

Curious Creatures take health and safety, and the regulatory environment, seriously. They are apparently the only workshop providers in Melbourne with a license class that allows for sexual contact between participants. For the roughly one-quarter of workshops that fall under this category, Curious Creatures meet and exceed their obligations in relation to providing an appropriately safe workshop environment.

ABOUT TESS DEVEZE

Tess is a qualified occupational therapist with a deep passion for, and experience working in, sexuality in neurological rehabilitation and disability in community and clinical settings. They co-facilitate several Curious Creatures workshops, and co-host intimacy party, Curiosity.

Tess is determined to enable all humans (regardless of gender, culture, lifestyle) to explore sexuality, sexual expression and embodiment regardless of/including persons with injury, chronic illness, differently abled bodies and neurological conditions.

With facilitation experience in clinical & non-clinical settings, wrapped up in a career history including teaching the circus arts internationally, health care, performing theatre, global festival hopping and a long-standing love of kink, Tess is determined to expand the sex positive culture and the freedom to explore sexuality to all.

Find out more at www.connectabletherapies.com.au

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