My First Piece With Elephant Journal!

Posted On: November 11, 2014

I have been following and resharing the articles on Elephant Journal for more than two years. And it was only earlier this year that it occured to me that I could contribute towards it.

I finally got my act together over Sunday 9 Nov (yeah another do-it-by-the-end-of-this-year thing). I was in flow and “banged” out nine pieces between 4p.m. and 4a.m.

I ended up submiting five pieces to Elephant Journal.

They told me:

  • Two were not for them – due to the style, tone, and content.
  • Two needed to be revised but can be reconsidered.
  • One was accepted.

And this was the one…


The one that I was scared to write because…

  • Of my fear of being judged.
  • Of getting it wrong.
  • Of not being good enough.

That’s the one Elephant Journal wanted: my guts.

I let it all out on paper, and it hurt when it came out.

But it felt good.

So this one is for the women who love men…

And for the men who hurt from loving them, and being misunderstood. I feel for you too. Really.

Presenting…. 7 Things to Bear in Mind When Communicating With a Man

This article hit 187 shares and 5,578 views and counting in less than 12 hours of being published.

And this is an email I received from a subscriber of my mailing list. I reshare it below with his kind permission:

“Martha, your insight is right-on! I am in the midst at this time of a divorce. My wife has close to zero per cent of those communication skills. Were they ever evident in her, our marriage might have been quite a success.

Even in our separation now, her voice and manner of speech are so difficult for me to deal with.

One might think that when the separation comes, we at last might have rational discussions, but that’s not the case. Truly, I’ve found that hearing her speak is pretty much unbearable for me. The tone of her voice has seldom been in a range I could deal with, and now that we are separated during this pre-divorce time, you might think it wouldn’t be necessary to continue in the same manner. Oh well!

Perhaps if she had access to this wonderful and enlightening article you’ve written, there’d be a rapprochement in our relationship.

I am hopeful that your marvelous writing will touch many women’s hearts, and that they’ll recognize the beauty and wisdom you’ve shared, and then set in motion a new way of speaking to their men.

I’m so pleased that you included me in your mailing. This is revelatory information, and I applaud you for your insight and your desire to help those who still have the time and desire to get things right with their man.

Your wisdom is much appreciated.

My Best to you,
George M. Akerley”

Updated on 29 Dec 2014: I’ve been promoted from contributor to columnist with Elephant Journal. You can find all my articles at a quick glance here!
Please leave your comments on Facebook and Twitter and in the meantime, keep loving, live life fully and stay lovely!
Dr. Martha Tara Lee is Founder and Clinical Sexologist of Eros Coaching. She is a certified sexologist with a Doctorate in Human Sexuality. She provides sexuality and relationship coaching for individuals and couples, conducts sexual education workshops and speaks at public events. She is the author of the book Love, Sex and Everything In-Between, and the host of the weekly radio show Eros Evolution on OMTimes Radio. For more, visit or email
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