How Long Would You Wait?

Posted On: August 14, 2016

This Dutchman waited for his girlfriend to show up for 10 days at the airport until he had to be hospitalised…

Read it here.

In a separate story, a ‘Hachiko’: Man waits 20 years by train station when his girlfriend doesn’t show up.
Read it here.

Back in those days when we didn’t have mobile phones or the Internet, I was still in primary school when I couldn’t keep to my date with a friend.
She waited for me for an hour, and I felt terrible about doing that to her.
I would usually wait for people up to 30 minutes when it comes to social gatherings.

What about you?
How long would you wait for somebody you care about?

The good thing about having been in private practice of seven years is that many clients have admitted to waiting… for years before seeking help from me.
They would be in a bad place – angry, resentful, blaming, hurt, crying, and hopeless.
It breaks my heart but there have been times when there’s just too much – it’s too little, too late.

As a rule of thumb, if you have an unresolved issue of more than six months, you should seek professional help.

7 Reasons Why Waiting doesn’t help

Most people

  1. Keep doing the same thing hoping for different results.
  2. Get well-meaning advice that actually don’t work.
  3. Don’t know what they don’t know – and come up with conclusions all on their own.
  4. Don’t know what else to do – they are not the subject experts.
  5. Get more confused by doing online search and trying different things from random sites.
  6. Keep comparing with “others” and have unrealistic expectations in their heads.
  7. Have more self-blame, guilt, shame and anxiety, and start withholding or withdrawing from their partners.

Don’t let your own ego, fear or resistance get in the way of your relationship.

Don’t wait until it’s a situation of too little, too late.

You deserve to be happy.

A stitch in time saves nine.

Details here. 

Who is Martha?

marthaFounder of Eros Coaching, Dr. Martha Tara Lee is a Clinical Sexologist in Singapore who has a doctorate in human sexuality. She also holds certificates in counselling, coaching and sex therapy. In practice for seven years now, she is the only certified sexuality educator by the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT) in Singapore. This accolade is only for those who meet the stringent requirements determined by AASECT, which is the leading professional organization for sexuality educators, sexuality counselors and sex therapists in the United States.

Often cited in the local media, Dr. Lee is the appointed sex expert for Men’s Health Singapore, and Men’s Health Malaysia. She was recognised as one of ‘Top 50 Inspiring Women Under 40′ by Her World in July 2010, and one of ‘Top 100 Inspiring Women’ by CozyCot in March 2011. She has published two books: Love, Sex and Everything In-Between, and Orgasmic Yoga.

Martha works with individuals and couples in private coaching sessions, and conducts her own workshops. She takes prides in making sure all her workshops are also fun, educational, and sex-positive. This comes easily to her because even though she is extremely dedicated and serious about her work, she fundamentally believes that sex is meant to be fun, wonderful, amazing and sacred. As such, this serious light-heartedness has shone through again and again. You can read the testimonials she’s received over her seven years of practice here. For her full profile, click here.

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