Men have their caves, and now women have their sheds.
In the United States, “She Sheds” are a new trend that allow women to escape to their own personal private retreats, without leaving home. More here.
This is a teachable moment though:
I work with a lot of men and women who suffer from low sexual desire. Sometimes they have this condition for no other reason other than reeling from the multiple challenges of life and coming apart at the seams. They need to take the time to rest, but believe they cannot.
They become used to being unhappy and see no way out. Instead they rather complain, stay bitter about their portion in life, and be jaded or hardened. No wonder they don’t feel like having sex! Instead they may push themselves harder (“I need a bigger sex toy”), fail and feel worse (“See, I did try! It doesn’t work!), then blame themselves more (“I’m so dumb.”).
- Taking time out is needed even in a healthy, loving relatioship for both men and women.
- The need for solo time and self-care is key to calming down our nervous system, being able to reflect on life, and gaining perspective of what we really want.
- We can, with some creativity and imagination, create spaces that are our private sanctuaries.
- Examples of alternative “she sheds”: a designated corner in the house; an assigned cushion; a bag where you can bring to somewhere in a public park.
- Even going within helps: reconnecting with your breath and breathing consciously; attending a yoga class; doing meditation. No time for a class? There are llots of YouTube videos you can start with!
P.S. While we’re on this subject of relationships, you’d really want to listen to my latest episode of Eros Evolution where I interview Dr Kat van Kirk on her 5 Tenants of Married Sex Life here!
Soul Retreats for Women
Since January, I’ve been running weekly classes for women to come together to:
- Practice ancient arts of being woman
- Get in touch with their femininity
- Develop their self-awareness and intutitive powers
- Return to sisterhood and fellowhood
- Pause and regroup within
On a break
On that note, I will be away June 22 to 30. I am taking my quarterly retreat (one week off every three weeks). This is a routine I created for myself to rest so that I can continue in my journey of serving people. This is my dedication to myself and to my clients. During this time, I will have limited access to email. Please be patient as I do read and respond to every email personally.
Dr. Martha Tara Lee is Founder and Clinical Sexologist of Eros Coaching. She is a certified sexologist with a Doctorate in Human Sexuality. She provides sexuality and relationship coaching for individuals and couples, conducts sexual education workshops and speaks at public events. She is the author of the book Love, Sex and Everything In-Between, and the host of the weekly radio show Eros Evolution on OMTimes Radio. For more, visit www.ErosCoaching.com or email firstname.lastname@example.org.