Yes, No, Maybe Activity Lists for Couples

Posted On: January 6, 2022

When sex is interwoven with culture, values and religion, many of us do not get to experience or explore the full spectrum of human sexual expression possibilities until when coupled. I’ve often had clients asked me what is out there to do sexually since they don’t know what they don’t know.

Whilst I really don’t like people to think of sex as a checklist of activities, yet these Yes, No, Maybe lists can be a good point of reference and also good conversation starter tool for clients to use.

I’ve pulled together different lists created by colleagues, so download them and I hope they help you in exploring your sexuality whether solo or partnered.

1. Want, Will, Won’t List 

A map to your most sexual desires. This chart is going to help you get clarity on the things you want to do to a partner, the things you want done to you, the things you will do to a partner, the things you will allow to be done to you and the things that are a hard limit regarding expansive sexual play.

2. Yes, No, Maybe So: A Sexual Inventory Stocklist

Yes, No, Maybe So: A Sexual Inventory Stocklist for Body Boundaries, Words & Terms, Relationship Models & Choices, Safer Sex and Overall Safety Items and Behaviors, Sexual Responses, Physical and/or Sexual Activities, Non-Physical (or not necessarily physical) Sexual Activities and Birth Control/Reproductive Choices.

3. Sexpalooza Handout

We’re gonna kind of make this like the hanky code. Check the circle on the left for giving/ topping and the right for receiving/ bottoming. If it’s kind of mutual activity.

4. Yes-No-Maybe: A Kinky List

The Yes/No/Maybe list is exactly what it sounds like: a list of sexual, or sensual, acts and experiences and an indication that you will, will not, or might do that freaky shit.


Yes or no or maybe | That Other Paper. (2007, March 22). That Other Paper Is Copyright 2006–2008 Four Kitchen Studios, LLC.

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About Dr. Martha Tara Lee

Surrounded by friends who were sexually inhibited and struck by dire lack of positive conversations around sex and sexuality in Singapore, Dr. Martha Tara Lee set out to make a positive difference in embarking on her doctorate in human sexuality before launching Eros Coaching in 2009. Today, she remains dedicated to working with individuals and couples who wish to lead self-actualised and pleasure-filled lives.

She also holds certificates in counselling, coaching and sex therapy, and her fourth degree – a Masters in Counselling in May 2018. In practice since 2009, she is the only certified sexuality educator and certified sexuality educator supervisor by the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT) in Singapore.

Often cited in the media, Dr. Lee is the appointed Clinical Sexologist for Singapore Cancer Society. She was recognised as one of ‘Top 50 Inspiring Women Under 40′ by Her World in July 2010, and one of ‘Top 100 Inspiring Women’ by CozyCot in March 2011. She has published four books: Love, Sex and Everything In-BetweenOrgasmic YogaFrom Princess to Queen and {Un}Inhibited.

Martha works with individuals and couples in private coaching sessions, and conducts her own workshops. She takes prides in making sure all her workshops are also fun, educational, and sex-positive. This comes easily to her because even though she is extremely dedicated and serious about her work, she fundamentally believes that sex is meant to be fun, wonderful, amazing and sacred. As such, this serious light-heartedness has shone through again and again. For her full profile, click here. Email her here.



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