Why Doesn't He Want Sex? Answered by Sexologist Dr Martha Tara Lee

Relationship Counselor & Clinical Sexologist of Eros Coaching Dr. Martha Tara Lee answers a crowd-sourced question: Why he doesn’t want sex published in The Independent Girlfriend: “I have higher sex drive than him… not sure why he’s not keen on having sex.” — Two women seek advice

Things I would ask/ look into:

Whether masturbating? how often? As a gauge for sexual drive
Any possible religious guilt
Tired/ stress/ anxiety are all real
Understanding of relationship not just for companionship
Whether less sexual attraction and it is not a bad thing (just needs addressing)
May not don’t like pressure/ pushing/ force/ told to do things
Focused on other things – onwards
How to making sex happen/ a priority
Any existing sexual difficulties

About Dr. Martha Tara Lee

Surrounded by friends who were sexually inhibited and struck by dire lack of positive conversations around sex and sexuality in Singapore, Dr. Martha Tara Lee set out to make a positive difference in embarking on her doctorate in human sexuality before launching Eros Coaching in 2009. Today, she remains dedicated to working with individuals and couples who wish to lead self-actualised and pleasure-filled lives.

She also holds certificates in counselling, coaching and sex therapy, and her fourth degree – a Masters in Counselling in May 2018. In practice for more than 12 years, she is the only certified sexuality educator and certified sexuality educator supervisor by the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT) in Singapore.

Often cited in the media, Dr. Lee is the appointed Resident Sexologist for PinkLifestyle.com, Singapore Cancer Society, and Ofnoah.sg and Ofzoey.com. She was recognised as one of ‘Top 50 Inspiring Women Under 40′ by Her World in July 2010, and one of ‘Top 100 Inspiring Women’ by CozyCot in March 2011. She has published four books: Love, Sex and Everything In-Between, Orgasmic Yoga, From Princess to Queen and {Un}Inhibited.

Martha works with individuals and couples in private coaching sessions, and conducts her own workshops. She takes prides in making sure all her workshops are also fun, educational, and sex-positive. This comes easily to her because even though she is extremely dedicated and serious about her work, she fundamentally believes that sex is meant to be fun, wonderful, amazing and sacred. As such, this serious light-heartedness has shone through again and again. For her full profile, click here. Email her here.